enthusiastically ellebee

Wisdom from the Interwebz

2012-01-27T08:53:00.000-06:00

God made.
Adam bit.
Noah arked.
Abraham split.
Joseph ruled.
Jacob fooled.
Bush talked.
Moses balked.
Pharaoh plagued.
People walked.
Sea divided.
Tablets guided.
Promise landed.
Saul freaked.
David peeked.
Prophets warned.
Jesus born.
God walked.
Love talked.
Anger crucified.
Hope died.
Love rose.
Spirit flamed.
Word spread.
God remained.

You Are God Alone

2009-09-11T11:55:00.002-05:00

Today is a day of remembrance.
Remembering the innocents who lost their lives.

At work.

At play.

In the air.

On the land.

Today is a day of remembrance.
Remembering the heroes who gave their lives.

In the towers.

On the planes.

On the ground.

Today is a day of remembrance.
Remembering our God who was and is with us all.

Music In My Head

2009-06-03T10:13:00.002-05:00

This song has been getting a lot of airtime on the Christian stations lately, and with good reason.

It's amazing.

There are several versions out there. The original group, Bluetree, of course. And Chris Tomlin, whom I love, but honestly? I think every other song on the radio is him!

I found this lovely acoustic version by its creator, Aaron Boyd of Bluetree. It's not as polished as the full band version, but there's something true in the rawness of a simple voice accompanied by acoustic guitar.

And how cool is it to hear the story behind the song.

It is a great reminder.

Been Away

2009-05-28T10:46:00.002-05:00

Which I'm sure is painfully obvious to any readers left out there! This two-blog business is a bit more than I bargained for, but I absolutely had to share this one. Falls under the "unbelievable" category. As my fellow blogger Mary noted, I too am hoping this is a fluke and not the start of a trend.

From 10News.com out of San Diego, California:

A local pastor and his wife claim they were interrogated by a San Diego County official, who then threatened them with escalating fines if they continued to hold bible studies in their home, 10News reported. Attorney Dean Broyles of The Western Center For Law & Policy was shocked with what happened to the pastor and his wife. Broyles said, "The county asked, 'Do you have a regular meeting in your home?' She said, 'Yes.' 'Do you say amen?' 'Yes.' 'Do you pray?' 'Yes.' 'Do you say praise the Lord?' 'Yes.'"

The county employee notified the couple that the small bible study, with an average of 15 people attending, was in violation of county regulations, according to Broyles. Broyles said a few days later the couple received a written warning that listed "unlawful use of land" and told them to "stop religious assembly or apply for a major use permit" -- a process that could cost tens of thousands of dollars." For churches and religious assemblies there's big parking concerns, there's environmental impact concerns when you have hundreds or thousands of people gathering. But this is a different situation, and we believe that the application of the religious assembly principles to this bible study is certainly misplaced," said Broyles.

News of the case has rapidly spread across Internet blogs and has spurred various reactions. Broyles said his clients have asked to stay anonymous until they give the county a demand letter that states by enforcing this regulation the county is violating their First Amendment right to freely exercise their religion. Broyles also said this case has broader implications. "If the county thinks they can shut down groups of 10 or 15 Christians meeting in a home, what about people who meet regularly at home for poker night? What about people who meet for Tupperware parties? What about people who are meeting to watch baseball games on a regular basis and support the Chargers?" said Broyles.

Broyles and his clients plan to give the county their demand letter this week.If the county refuses to release the pastor and his wife from obtaining the permit, they will consider a lawsuit in federal court.

Be Still Sunday

2009-05-24T00:01:00.000-05:00

Be Still Sunday

2009-05-17T00:01:00.000-05:00

Be Still Sunday

2009-05-10T00:01:00.000-05:00

Be Still Sunday

2009-05-03T00:01:00.000-05:00

Bless me Father, for I have sinned.

2009-04-27T14:00:00.002-05:00

I grew up in a liturgical church. It was very legalistic in the sense that you were REQUIRED to go to church on Sunday (or you were sinning); you were REQUIRED to go to confession before you took communion (or you were sinning); you were REQUIRED to fast for at least an hour before receiving communion (or you were sinning). I learned about sins of commission, sins of omission, mortal sins and venial sins. I learned about Heaven, Hell, Purgatory and Limbo.

I grew up believing that these rules and regulations were sanctioned by God Himself. To be a "good Catholic", you went to church on Sunday (or Saturday after 4 pm), confessed your sins to the priest on a regular basis, and abstained from eating meat on Fridays during Lent. In my senior religion class, we were told that the primary reason for marriage was procreation.

Then I went to college. A public institution. Where I wasn't REQUIRED to go to church on Sunday; I wasn't REQUIRED to take religion classes; I wasn't REQUIRED to go to confession.

I was Catholic in name only.

During my freshman year, a friend shared with me some materials from Campus Crusade for Christ, an Evangelical Christian organization with chapters on many college campuses around the world.

The materials were about "getting to know God personally" and "receiving Christ". These were foreign concepts to me. "Getting to know God" sounded all Bible-belt and born-again to me, and "receiving Christ" was something I did at communion on Sundays. What really got me, though, was when she quoted Romans 3:23.

"All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

Now, it wasn't like I considered myself perfect, or anything. I knew perfection was God's business. But I certainly didn't consider myself a SINNER! I was a good girl. I listened to my parents, did well in school, didn't lie, cheat or steal, went to church occasionally, was nice to my brother and had lots of friends. I didn't drink or smoke, and I didn't even THINK about sex!

A sinner? Me?

So we chatted and basically agreed to disagree. She was still a sweet and dear friend and we just went our separate ways when it came to religion.

Fast forward twenty-odd years.

I get it. I am a sinner. And to use the words of my three year-old, The Manimal, it makes God "so sad" when I sin. And he doesn't want to send me to Hell. He just wants to bring me back into the fold.

Now I know. True Christianity isn't about just following a bunch of rules to the letter (although rules can be good guidelines). It isn't about standing or sitting at just the right time (but again, disciplined worship isn't necessarily a bad thing).

It's about relationships. Starting with the most important one, and building (or rebuilding, as the case warrants) from there. So while my friend didn't realize it, God had a plan, as He always does. I wasn't ready to hear her words (or His).

It's about loving and living others to God. Praying for others, yes. But more importantly, SHOWING the love of God by how we live.

It's about realizing that God really loves us and wants the best for us. He wants us to make good decisions, in consultation with Him. He wants us to live our lives to glorify Him. He wants us welcome Him into our hearts, minds, bodies and souls.

And really, all it takes is a simple request on our part.

Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
I have offended you and I am most truly sorry.
I firmly resolve, through Your grace,
to do my penance and change my life.
To live my life...

Enthusiastically.

Remember

2009-04-20T11:44:00.001-05:00

I was riding in a car from Chicago to Indianapolis for a work event when I heard what happened. Because our event would feature the talents of hundreds of high school-aged musicians, we were especially shaken.

What if the same thing had happened, not in Colorado, but in one of the schools that would perform throughout the weekend?

And then there were the kids. They were thinking the same thing. What if? What if the shooters were students at their own schools? What if their friends had died? What if....?

And yet, that Colorado high school moved on. The kids from the school rebounded, as kids do. They moved on, and graduated. Got jobs and went to college. Had relationships, got married, stayed single.

Lived their lives.

Today, take just a moment to pray. Remember the kids, those who lived and those who died. Remember the community. Remember the two shooters who, in a matter of minutes, changed the world forever.

But most of all, remember the life. Like the flower for which the community is named, the school came through the adversity of a long, cold winter.

And blossomed.

He is Risen!

2009-04-12T13:23:00.005-05:00

How sweet the sound!

I once was lost,
But now am found.

My God, my Savior
Has ransomed me!

Unending love...

He is risen indeed!

Good Friday

2009-04-10T18:22:00.004-05:00

A certain man from Cyrene, Simon, the father of Alexander and Rufus, was passing by on his way in from the country, and they forced him to carry the cross. They brought Jesus to the place called Golgotha (which means The Place of the Skull). Then they offered him wine mixed with myrrh, but he did not take it. And they crucified him. Dividing up his clothes, they cast lots to see what each would get.

It was the third hour when they crucified him. The written notice of the charge against him read: THE KING OF THE JEWS. They crucified two robbers with him, one on his right and one on his left. Those who passed by hurled insults at him, shaking their heads and saying, "So! You who are going to destroy the temple and build it in three days, come down from the cross and save yourself!"

In the same way the chief priests and the teachers of the law mocked him among themselves. "He saved others," they said, "but he can't save himself! Let this Christ, this King of Israel, come down now from the cross, that we may see and believe." Those crucified with him also heaped insults on him.

At the sixth hour darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour. ³⁴And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?"—which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

When some of those standing near heard this, they said, "Listen, he's calling Elijah."

One man ran, filled a sponge with wine vinegar, put it on a stick, and offered it to Jesus to drink. "Now leave him alone. Let's see if Elijah comes to take him down," he said.

With a loud cry, Jesus breathed his last.

The curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom.

Mark 15:21-38 (NIV)

Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble.
Were you there when they crucified my Lord?

Were you there when they nailed Him to the tree?
Were you there when they nailed Him to the tree?
Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble.
Were you there when they nailed Him to the tree?

Were you there when they laid Him in the tomb?
Were you there when they laid Him in the tomb?
Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble.
Were you there when they laid Him in the tomb?

Enthusiastic Inspiration

2009-04-09T09:20:00.002-05:00

This week, I've been blessed to be able to participate in the A Woman Inspired Web Conference. There have been so many wonderful speakers and I'm really looking forward to downloading the mp3's when they become available and listening again!

Yesterday, I heard Melissa Michaels and Allison Worthington talk about what God can do through you. Melissa is the creative genius behind The Inspired Room, her blog and redecorating business. Alli is known to Blogland as Mrs. Fussypants, as well as the media matriarch behind Blissfully Domestic and The Worthington Wire.

These women are amazing! Both have incredible stories about God carrying them through some serious issues in their lives and how He inspired them to create their businesses and ministries. They talked about hearing God speak to them and how you know something is God-inspired, rather than just "a good idea".

God must've known that I needed to hear them at that time, because it was exactly what I needed to hear. I've had an idea rolling around in my noggin for awhile now and feel as though God has been trying to tell me something. My dear girlfriend (also a believer) suggested that I take some time to do guided journaling, to listen to Him very closely and try to write what I hear. Then Melissa and Alli talked about listening for His voice.

Hmm....maybe I need to clean out my ears!

Enthusiastically listening for His voice, and praying for His grace, but all in His time...

A Woman Inspired

2009-04-08T11:49:00.001-05:00

An Enthusiastic Hello to all my new friends from the "A Woman Inspired" Conference! I'm SO enjoying the sessions and hope you are as well!

Above All

2009-03-30T16:42:00.003-05:00

I love the music of Michael W. Smith. I first heard of him when I was a summer camp counselor and a friend introduced me to the classic "Friends".

Growing up in a liturgical church, I didn't really have that "personal" relationship with Christ. Living in the northernmost portion of the Bible Belt, that was something I left to the "born again" Christians. My friend Bonnie was "Christian" and shared with me her love of the music of Michael W. Smith and Amy Grant.

I loved it and have been a fan ever since. Lately, this worship song has been speaking my heart. Whenever I really get to thinking, I can't wrap my brain around a God who loves us more than ANYTHING. A Father to whom we are all HIS FAVORITE.

It's just bigger than my simple little mind can imagine.

So I enthusiastically sing...

Above all powers, above all kings
Above all nature, and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began.

Above all kingdoms, above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what You're worth.

Crucified, laid behind a stone.
You lived to die, rejected and alone.
Like a rose, trampled on the ground,
You took the fall, and thought of me

Above all.

Circle of Life

2009-03-26T14:27:00.002-05:00

Please take a swim over and visit my friend Michelle at Island Time Blog. She and I were college classmates (and fellow Bandos) and have recently reconnected through Facebook. She has a wonderful post up about life, death and resurrection...

Dance Partner

2009-03-24T08:38:00.003-05:00

Being raised in a liturgical church, we never talked about having a "personal relationship" with Jesus. That was for those "born again" Christians so prevalent in the area of the Bible Belt where I grew up.

Over the last few years, however, I've seen what I've been missing. So as not to become depressed about what I missed, I have to believe that God brought me to my new church in His time, and my church/faith/religious experience to this point was simply preparing me for this new relationship with Him.

This video is incredible. I'm unsure of the origin, but there are several versions on YouTube. This was the first one I saw, and very well-done. Take a few minutes to watch it. Drink it in. See the symbolism.

See the dancer, as she struggles through life, and perhaps you'll recognize some of the struggles in your own life. See the Christ figure as he strains to reach her grasping hands and know that He is ALWAYS there, even in your darkest hours, fighting for you.

Dear sweet Lord,
When we struggle with life
May we always remember that You
are waiting in the wings.
Ready to once again
become our enthusiastic dance partner.

What Is Easter?

2009-03-09T15:11:00.002-05:00

Sometimes in the midst of Lenten sacrifices it's easy to get caught up in the rules, and forget that we are to be preparing ourselves, body, mind and spirit to receive the Risen Christ in our hearts.

This past Sunday in church, our pastor reminded us of the meaning of Easter.

Easter is when God turned to Satan and yelled, "Surprise!"

Enthusiastically preparing,

Pay It Forward

2009-03-04T09:51:00.002-06:00

Ooohh! I'm SO blessed! Last week I entered 12 Arrows "Pay It Forward" Giveaway.

And I won!

Now I have to decide what I'm going to give away! Stay tuned! ;)

VERY Enthusiastically,

Anyway

2009-02-28T16:34:00.002-06:00

One of my pet peeves is having to deal with stupid people. Rude people irritate me to no end. Fortunately or unfortunately, it's not likely that I'll be able to walk away from those types of people, nor will they quit appearing in my life. I consider myself to be fair and patient with most folks. Sadly, that fairness and patience sometimes goes out the window, and I find myself struggling to not be sarcastic and biting.

I love this passage. It's called "The Paradoxical Commandments". Often attributed to Mother Teresa, it was actually part of a booklet by Kent Keith, titled "The Silent Revolution: Dynamic Leadership in the Student Council".

People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.

Love them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies.

Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.

Be good anyway.

Honesty and frankness will make you vulnerable.

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.

Build anyway.

People need help, but may attack you if you try to help them.

Help them anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God.

It was never between you and them anyway.

Maybe I need to go back to school.

Pray Hard

2009-02-13T15:06:00.003-06:00

If I have any readers left at all, just wanted to let you know I'm still here! Things have been a bit crazy for the last couple of weeks, but hopefully I'll get back on track soon.

I don't know about you, but I'm not a big fan of the 24 hour news channels, like CNN and Fox News. Aside from the fact that they tend to repeat stories ad nauseum (because seriously, how much news happens within a 24 hour period?), most of the daily news is, well, depressing. And in the grand scheme of things, there's not a whole lot that most of us can do except continue with our day-to-day lives.

Take, for example, the economy. It stinks right now. Some call it a "downturn". Others, a "recession". Most of us don't care what it's called. We just know that prices are higher than they used to be, and more people are out of work.

In our family, we're more frugal than we used to be. We put off purchases, try to spend our income more wisely. Which, in any economy, is really a good thing. We are spending more time at home. For example, Friday nights have become family movie night. Microwave popcorn and a movie from Blockbuster are a great way to spend time together without leaving the house and dropping about forty bucks! AND you can talk and laugh during the movie without fear of offending fellow viewers. And it doesn't hurt that you can pause when you have to, ahem, use the facilities. :)

But what about these politicians and media outlets that warn us of impending doom? Now, don't get me wrong. It's not that I'm not concerned about the state of things. I just don't think it does any good to get all freaked out and worried when I'm really doing what I need to be doing. I'm watching my pennies. And praying. Prayer always helps.

Maybe if our elected officials did a bit more praying they wouldn't feel the need to spend money to save the economy.

Dearest Lord,
In these times of uncertainty, You are here.
In the times of plenty, You are here.
Remind us again, that nothing has really changed.
You are still here.
And we are still here.
And that, as always, is good.

Enthusiastically,

For Jacob...

2009-01-15T14:11:00.002-06:00

I think you would've liked this...

"There's one more angel in Heaven
There's one more star in the sky
Joseph we'll never forget you
It's tough but we're gonna get by..."

With a heavy heart, but trusting in Him...

Worship

2009-01-06T12:30:00.005-06:00

A post from fellow blogger Heather inspired this post...

Our church services are a lot like many other Protestant churches. We have the traditional "worship songs" and prayer time. We have the Pastor's message. We have quiet time to really be "in the moment". Recently, our pastor and his wife (our worship director) have been incorporating more opportunities for individual worship into our services.

This led me to really consider how I worship. What goes through my mind, my heart, my soul. I grew up in a liturgical church where "properly worshiping" included standing, sitting and kneeling at the right time and knowing what to say when. I thought I would be in that church forever. I even did graduate studies thinking that God was calling me to help teach youth about the Church.

Then one day, my "worship experience" seemed flat. I was "going through the motions" more than really seeking God with my whole heart. After a long period of doing nothing, returning to what I knew, and seeking elsewhere, I found a new church home.

Suddenly, the comfort of routine was gone. I was worried that I "wasn't doing it right", whatever "it" was. I loved the "feel" of my new church. The pastor was wonderful, the people were loving, and somehow I could really sense the presence of God in that place. I knew in my heart that I was in a good church.

But I still never really THOUGHT about worship. Music is HUGELY important to me (I was a band and choir director in a former life!) and I rely on it often as a primary form of worship. Now I wonder if I've been relying solely on music. The focus of worship should be about WHO, not HOW.

Over the past couple of years, God has really been working in my heart and life. I have a lot of "baggage", as many people do. My pastor and church community have been a huge support system for me. I've been able to get involved with so much in our church and have come around to the thinking that anything I do can glorify God, if done with a servant's heart and loving spirit.

That is worship.

One of my resolutions for this year is to eat better and exercise regularly so I can lose weight and become healthier. Taking care of my physical body is not just self-preservation. It is wanting to be there for my children and husband. It is wanting take care of God's precious gift to me, to be a good steward of this temple.

It is worship.

“It’s who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That’s the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration.” - John 4:23-24 (The Message)

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T00:01:00.000-06:00

For Such a Time As This

2008-12-21T21:08:00.002-06:00

I get it. For the first time, I get it.

He cares for ME.

HE cares for me.

He knew, that for me to get it, He would have to come down as a baby. A poor, innocent child.

The King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel...

A baby. God with us.

And during this Advent season, this time of preparation, it is good to remember that this sweet little Child whom we celebrate, was born to die. To save us all. I don't say this to be a "downer" during a season of celebration. Rather, it is important to remember "the reason for the season".

Tonight at our Candlelight Christmas Celebration (we rent space in a school and are only able to use it on the weekends), one of the Pastors shared a story...

It was a few days before Christmas and a young mother decided to brave the mall and wrap up her Christmas shopping with her two young children. There were people everywhere, and the children seemed insistent on misbehaving.

Finally, the harried young mother was done with her shopping. The children were asleep in their double stroller, naughtiness had completely exhausted them. Shopping bags were hung all around the stroller, and the mother carefully wheeled the whole mass into the elevator.

The elevator crowds parted like the Red Sea. When she was finally positioned in the elevator, she breathed a sigh of relief, and to no one in particular, muttered aloud, "Whoever thought up this Christmas thing should be arrested and strung up!"

A moment passed, and then a quiet voice in the back of the elevator said, "Ma'am, I think that's been taken care of."

May we never forget the true "reason for the season".

Give Presence

2008-12-15T14:31:00.007-06:00

This year I've been trying to be more aware of the Advent Season. It always seems like those four weeks prior to Christmas just get lost in the countdown.

Advent is meant to be a time of preparation and waiting--not a solemn, sad kind of waiting, but waiting with anticipation, waiting for Him. Sort of a breathless eagerness. I always think of the song "Something's Coming" from West Side Story....

Could be! Who knows?
There's something due any day;
I will know right away,
Soon as it shows.

It may come cannonballing down through the sky,
Gleam in its eye,
Bright as a rose! Who knows?

It's only just out of reach,
Down the block, on a beach,
Under a tree.
I got a feeling there's a miracle due,
Gonna come true,
Coming to me!

Could it be? Yes, it could.
Something's coming, something good,
If I can wait!
Something's coming,
I don't know what it is,
But it is Gonna be great!

With a click, with a shock,
Phone'll jingle, door'll knock,
Open the latch!
Something's coming, don't know when, but it's soon;
Catch the moon, One-handed catch!

Around the corner,
Or whistling down the river,
Come on, deliver
To me!

Will it be?
Yes, it will.
Maybe just by holding still,
It'll be there!
Come on, something, come on in, don't be shy,
Meet a guy,
Pull up a chair!
The air is humming,
And something great is coming!

Who knows?
It's only just out of reach,
Down the block, on a beach,
Maybe tonight . . .

Wouldn't it be amazing if we Christians could, for the four weeks prior to Christmas, step back and prepare? I'm not talking about baking and cooking, shopping and cleaning, the frantic-ness that typically is associated with preparing for the holidays. I'm talking about praying and playing, smiling and giving.

You know, really living?

The folks over at The Advent Conspiracy think it would be amazing. Check out this video...

Dearest Lord Jesus,

In the remaining time of the Advent Season, help us live as the Advent Conspiracy says...
by worshiping fully,
spending less
giving more
and most importantly,
loving all.

And may we do these things with hopeful, expectant enthusiasm.

Waiting and Preparing

2008-12-14T20:44:00.003-06:00

The skies don't seem to be as dark as usual.
The stars seem brighter than they've been before.
And deep within I feel my soul is stirring
As though my hope
Has been restored.

The shepherds say they've heard the voice of angels
Confirming rumors spread across the land.
That a child protected well from Herod's anger
Is our Father's Son and the Son of Man.

Love is raining down on the world tonight.
There's a presence here, I can tell.
God is in us. God is for us. God is with us.
Emmanuel!

He's the Savior we have been praying for.
In our humble hearts He will dwell.
God is in us. God is for us. God is with us.
Emmanuel!

I feel compelled to tell all who will listen
That peace on Earth is not so out of reach.
If we can find grace and mercy and forgiveness
He has come to save.
He is all of these.

Love is raining down on the world tonight.
There's a presence here, I can tell.
God is in us. God is for us. God is with us.
Emmanuel!

He's the Savior we have been praying for.
In our humble hearts He will dwell.
God is in us. God is for us. God is with us.
Emmanuel!

God is in us. God is for us. God is with us.
Emmanuel!

--Wayne Kirkpatrick

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-26T21:24:00.002-06:00

I thank my God for every remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine, making request for all of you with joy, for your fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now being confident of this very thing. He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.

Philippians 1:3-7

With enthusiastic gratitude,

Sweet Gratitude

2008-11-23T21:00:00.003-06:00

Noah's Mommy, the sweetie that she is, gave me a lovely award! She's on my "follow list" and her tagline says it all, "The Life and Times of being a NEW stay at home mommy....and I thought the corporate world was hectic???"

I'm not a SAHM, but I have SO much respect for those of you who are, and it's my secret fantasy life! One of my favorite things about the blogosphere is all of the wonderful fellow bloggers I'm "meeting". I'm so grateful for all of you, and here are a few "Bloggy Goodness" picks!

My sweet IRL bloggy friend, Sunrae. I'm so blessed to have found our church community and made friends like you!

A new bloggy buddy, Kimmie, who is a passionate Christ-follower and self-proclaimed "orphan gatherer". She and her DH are loving parents to six children ("five adopted, one homemade"), and are in the process of adopting another.

Grafted Branch and her DH ("Jim Dear") are parents to three beautiful young ladies. She is an example of so much I aspire to be, and I love reading about her life!

Hiho-Ohio is a recent add to my bloglist, and she is wonderful! She just cut her beautiful long "creme brulee" hair to chin length, and donated FOUR ponytails to Locks of Love. What a sweetie!

These are just a few of the folks for whom I'm grateful as we head into Thanksgiving! Stop by and visit them, and be sure to tell your friends that you're grateful for them!

Dearest God, I am so grateful for my life, my family, my friends. I am grateful to You, who gave the greatest gift so I might enjoy all of my blessings, every single day.

Christmas Spirit

2008-11-17T11:35:00.002-06:00

I complain every year about Christmas being forced up on us earlier and earlier by a secular, sales-driven retail economy. I get all Scrooge-y by Thanksgiving because of the Christmas decorating that we do for my job.

I figured this year would be no exception, and yes, I did have my momentary rant. But honestly, I'm actually excited about the whole season this year. Maybe it's because Thanksgiving's a bit later. Maybe the economy and my quest to go "Christmas Frugal" has kind of gotten me really pondering the whole "true meaning of giving". At any rate, I found myself humming along to the Christmas tunes last night at Wal-Mart.

And wanting to hear more.

And buying my first Christmas decorations.

And finally getting around to deciding what to do about our rapidly-dwindling Nativity Scene.

And then I decided, while it's a bit annoying to see Christmas decorations up before Halloween, isn't it nice to start focusing on the birth of our Lord even that much earlier?

And how bad can something be if it makes us really focus on celebrating the season that precedes Christmas--Advent. A time of preparation, preparing our hearts and homes for the arrival of the Infant Saviour.

It's all about your perspective. And mine is from that of a wounded, broken heart, eagerly anticipating the arrival of a Saviour, Gift to All Humanity.

Enthusiastically preparing...

In the Quiet of the Morning

2008-11-15T03:30:00.002-06:00

3:26, according to my kitchen clock.

And yes, that would be a.m.

Not sure exactly why my body is so wide awake at this hour, but there you have it. I'm still battling the remnants of sick, so it may be that. Or it may be The Manimal, who in his half-asleep stage decided to invade my side of the bed.

The dog is pretty happy. While she's not exactly nocturnal, her lupine roots come through whenever there is a human conscious in the weird nighttime hours.

The house is blissfully (and unusually) quiet. The perpetual "on" state of both boy children has been silenced for more than the normal 18 minutes.

We have plans for later in the day, but for now, it is quiet. The family is safe and sleeping. All is well with the world.

Sick

2008-11-10T19:22:00.001-06:00

As in I am. Hope to be feeling better soon. Hard to feel enthusiastic about anything when I seem to be leaking out of every orifice.

Beautiful

2008-11-09T18:24:00.003-06:00

There are those days when I don't feel beautiful, inside or out. This song means so much to me, and although it was written as a love song between two people, it is a good thing to remember that's how our God feels about us as well.

"Beautiful in My Eyes" by Joshua Kadison

You're my peace of mind in this crazy world.
You're everything I've tried to find, your love is a pearl.
You're my Mona Lisa, you're my rainbow skies,
and my only prayer is that you realize
you'll always be beautiful in my eyes.

The world will turn and the seasons will change,
and all the lessons we will learn will be beautiful and strange.
We'll have our fill of tears, our share of sighs.
And my only prayer is that you realize
you'll always be beautiful in my eyes.

You will always be beautiful in my eyes.
And the passing years will showthat you will always grow ever more beautiful in my eyes.
When there are lines upon my face from a lifetime of smiles,
and when the time comes to embrace for one long last while,
we can laugh about how time really flies.
We won't say goodbye 'cause true love never dies.
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes.

You will always be beautiful in my eyes.
And the passing years will show
that you will always grow ever more beautiful in my eyes.
The passing years will show that you will always grow
ever more beautiful in my eyes.

Dearest Lord Jesus, Help me to remember that even when I feel like You couldn't possibly want me, You're always waiting for me to return.

Bubble, Bubble

2008-11-08T15:05:00.001-06:00

Bubbling around in my head. Lots of thoughts. Not too much clarity right now. Hope to be able to make some sense of it soon.

Memo

2008-11-07T10:59:00.002-06:00

11/7/08

To: ElleBee
From: The Boss
Re: Your Life

Today I will be handling all of your problems.

If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it. Simply put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. All situations will be resolved, but please note that resolution will come in My time, not yours.

Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.

If you find yourself stuck in traffic, don't despair. There are people in this world for which driving is an unheard of privilege.

Should you have a bad day at work, think of the man who is out of work.

Should you despair over a relationship gone bad, think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return.

Should you grieve the passing of another weekend, think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.

Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance, think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.

Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror, think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.

Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful. There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity.

Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities, remember, things could be worse. You could be one of them!

Innocence Lost

2008-11-06T12:54:00.003-06:00

I had no intention of writing anymore about the election. I'd said my piece.

Until last night.

Last night, my sweet eight year-old boy asked me a question that made me want to cry. For loss of innocence of children. For the ignorance and intolerance of adults. For my baby.

"Mommy, did Barack Obama say it's ok to kill babies?"

Now a few things before any of you go crazy conservative on me. I do plan to leave the comments open, and don't moderate this blog, but I reserve the right to delete that are vitriolic or attacking. This is not a forum for anger. I did vote for John McCain, but not because I agree with him across the board. I do believe that abortion is wrong, with few, if any, exceptions. My own belief is that yes, I'd love for abortion to be illegal if it would guarantee that nobody would ever have one. But we all know that's not how it would go down. If my views cause you to quit reading my blog, I'm sorry.

However, my view is not the point of this post.

I picked my jaw up off the ground and asked who told him that. He said that the kids at school told him that's what their parents said.

That's what their parents said.

Parents told their ELEMENTARY AGED CHILDREN that the President-Elect of the United States said it's OK to kill babies. And because they told their children this, I had to explain to my eight year-old child about abortion, and why people would want it to be legal, rather than illegal.

MY eight year-old.

And while I certainly support your right to raise your children in the manner you see fit, please do not use the religious veil of "pro-life" to excuse passing along hateful comments about public figures (or anyone for that matter) to your children. Because they will tell others. They will tell my child.

My eight year-old.

Who is a little less innocent today than yesterday.

No Worries!

2008-11-05T15:07:00.004-06:00

I know certain things about myself.

I dislike conflict.

I'm a control freak.

I'm also a certified rose-colored glasses wearing, Pollyanna, cockeyed optimist, glass-half-full kind of girl.

So today's reactions (of Republicans) to the results of yesterday's Presidential election are driving me a bit batty.

Perhaps your candidate didn't win. Perhaps you're REALLY disappointed. But honestly people, we have to remember who's still in charge here, and it's not Barack Obama (or George Bush, for the next 70+ days).

It's God. As in Jesus Christ, Savior of the World.

He's got it all under control.

So please, for the sanity and sake of all of the other non-Obama voters out there, please stop forecasting the doom and gloom. Instead, why don't we all focus on PRAYER?

From a website called "Fire In My Bones":

By J. Lee Grady

I’ll admit this election did not turn out as I had hoped. I supported McCain primarily because I am pro-life and I prefer his small-government mindset. But now that the election is over, I’m not going to harbor bitterness toward Obama supporters or go into attack mode. Obama has been elected president of this country, and that means I have a biblical responsibility to support him in prayer—even if I challenge his policies.

Whether you voted for Obama or not, you need to pray for him. Here are 10 ways I plan to intercede for him regularly:

1. Pray for Obama’s protection. We already know that some weird, neo-Nazi fanatics in Tennessee plotted to kill Sen. Obama during his campaign. Let’s pray that racist hatred is not allowed to spread. Let’s cancel every assassin’s bullet in the name of Jesus. May civility triumph over bigotry.

2. Cover his wife and daughters in prayer. It is not easy to live under constant media scrutiny. Pray for Obama’s wife, Michelle, and their two daughters, Malia and Natasha, as they face invasive cameras, nosy reporters, maniacal fans and dangerous enemies. Obama is not only a politician but also a husband and a father.

3. Pray that Obama will govern with God’s wisdom. God rewarded Solomon because he asked for wisdom instead of wealth, long life or vengeance on his enemies (see 1 Kings 3:11-12). Pray that Obama will order his priorities like that. Despite Solomon’s tragic character flaws, his legacy was wisdom. We can ask God to give our president the same grace.

4. Ask God to keep our president humble. Many great American leaders became corrupt after they moved to Washington. The fatal attraction of fame, wealth and power proved irresistible. The only thing that will guard a man or woman from this pitfall is humility. May God deliver President Obama from the curse of pride.

5. Pray for wise and righteous advisers to surround him. Godly leaders cannot do their job alone. Even the best leaders have failed because they trusted the wrong people. Pray that Obama will not select his counselors based on party, race, pedigree or political cronyism but on godly character and proven wisdom. Pray also that he will not allow secret traitors into his inner circle.

6. Ask for the spirit of reconciliation. Some segments of our deeply divided society want nothing to do with Obama now that he has won the presidency. Even some Christians will be tempted to harbor resentment and nurse political grudges throughout his term in office. Pray that God will grant forgiveness and healing so that leaders on all political levels can have constructive dialogue.

7. Pray that Obama will adopt pro-life convictions. Many politicians have changed their views on key issues while in office. In the 1800s some leaders who favored slavery later denounced it. In the 1950s some who opposed racial integration later became champions of it. Even though Obama won approval from many voters because he sanctions abortion, God could soften and change his heart.

8. Bind all evil forces assigned to manipulate our president. The specter of Islamic terrorism looms over the United States, and dark forces are ready to infiltrate. Our only hope lies in prayer to the God who is able to expose and outwit the schemes of the wicked. This is truly a time for spiritual warfare, and intercessors must not come off the wall in this hour! Pray that no foreign government, terrorist organization or demonic principality will use Obama as a tool. We must stand strong against the spirit of antichrist that promotes dictatorship, persecution of Christians and hostility toward Israel.

9. Pray that Obama’s door will remain open to the church. The loudest voices of secular culture—from Bill Maher in Hollywood to atheists in academia—would be happy if religion were removed from public life. Pray that Obama, who claims to have a personal faith in Jesus Christ, will unapologetically welcome Christian leaders into his company and seek their counsel. And pray that false religious leaders (who claim to know Christ but deny His power) will not have his ear.

10. Pray that our nation will enjoy God’s peace and blessing during the Obama administration. The apostle Paul instructed early believers to pray for all in authority “so that we may lead a tranquil and quiet life in all godliness and dignity” (1 Tim. 2:2, NASB). God’s will is for America to experience peace and prosperity so that we can continue to export the gospel to the nations. This must happen whether a Democrat or a Republican is in the White House. As we cry out for God’s mercy on our wayward nation, pray that He will allow us to be a light to the world as we finance global missions, feed and heal the world’s poor and share Christ’s love at home and abroad.

As a side note, Michelle & Barack Obama's daughters are Malia and Natasha, who is often called "Sasha".

Praying enthusiastically for our Nation and our World...

Go Forth and Vote

2008-11-04T10:56:00.002-06:00

As American citizens, we have the right and responsibility to help select the leaders of our towns, states and country. As a Christian, I have the right and responsibility to seek wise counsel and pray on my choices. Please consider your rights and responsibilities today.

Dearest Lord Jesus, help us all make wise, moral choices on this (and all) days. Lead us to select the best candidates for office, based on our conversations with You and others. Most of all, draw us closer to you, the Leader of all.

Enthusiastically awaiting the results of today's elections...

God's Truth

2008-11-03T11:57:00.005-06:00

In our small group from church, we're reading "Velvet Elvis" by Rob Bell. If you've not read it, I highly recommend it. The subtitle of "Repainting the Christian Faith" is so descriptive.

In the third chapter, Bell talks about finding and claiming truth in all aspects of life. Basically, his argument is that this world is God's world, so everything in it is His as well.

"So as a Christian, I am free to claim the good, the true, the holy, wherever and whenever I find it. I live with the understanding that truth is bigger than any religion and the world is God's and everything in it." (p.80)

He illustrates the point by describing a trip to Turkey, where he saw a great number of homes in various states of construction. "It looked like a lot of homes had been started and then the workers went to lunch...for a year." (p.80)

When he asked his friend about it, Bell learned that the Muslim culture doesn't allow for financial debt, so faithful Muslims only build when they have the cash to pay for it. They build for awhile, then stop, then start again when they have the money. Eventually they have a house, which they own free and clear.

Bell muses that "debt free" is certainly a better way to live than how most Americans live. He speaks of affirming this value because it is true and good, "a better way to live". It doesn't matter that it is a "Muslim" value; it is of God, and it is good.

This is a radical departure for some Christians, whose beliefs may lead them to condemn any "non-Christian" ideas or values. Recently, it has been much the same with Democrats and Republicans. People of either party may refuse to condone or agree with particular stances taken by the opposing party simply on the basis that they are OF the opposing party.

Tomorrow we will elect a new president. He may be a Democrat; the first Black man to serve our country in that position. He may be a Republican; the oldest first-term elected President. In the end, a whole lot of people will be disappointed because "their guy" didn't win.

I hope that at the end of the day, we all realize that God's truth is out there. It may not be where we expect it. It may, in fact, be where we least expect it. All we can do is pray purposefully that His will be done, and follow the words of Micah 6:8.

Do justice.

Love kindness.
Walk humbly with our God.

Always walking in Him,

Decor?

2008-11-02T16:33:00.004-06:00

It seems a bit early to go into full-blown holiday rant mode, so I'll spare you a bit, but I stopped by Target on Friday (October 31st, remember?) to pick up a few things and they were replacing the Halloween items...

With...

Christmas decorations.

Ugh.

Dearest God, please help us all to remember the TRUE meaning of Christmas. Help us to remember that You sent Your Son without the fanfare of Christmas trees, stockings or glass balls. Decorations are beautiful, and can help to enhance this beautiful season, but let us always remember that the spirit of Christ in a home is the most beautiful decoration of all.

NaBloPoMo

2008-11-01T15:58:00.002-05:00

Well, I'm going to try NaBloPoMo on, not one, but TWO blogs. We'll see how it goes.

I think it's pretty apropos for this blog. Why, you ask? Well, here's how I see it. Since one of the things I always struggle with is being a control freak, I am constantly trying to remember that God is here, with me, every.single.day.

So it only seems to make sense that I post something "enthusiastic" every.single.day. (At least for the month of November!)

Dear ever-present God, please remind us that You are ALWAYS with us.

Enthusiastically,

There is a Season

2008-10-22T20:49:00.002-05:00

"There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace." (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)

Today my paternal Grandma died.

She hasn't been well for sometime, but today at 2:30, she slipped away peacefully. My parents had just been to visit a couple of weeks ago, and my aunt and uncle arrived yesterday, so it seemed as though she was just waiting to see her children one last time.

She was 93, and had lived a long and full life, raised two children and had a career as a nurse. She outlived her first husband, my grandfather, by 33 years, and married another wonderful man, whom she outlived by nearly 15 years.

She was born in Minnesota to Finnish parents, and with my grandpa, raised my father and his sister in the suburbs of Chicago. By the time I remember them, they lived in West Yarmouth, Massachusetts.

They weren't the kind of grandparents that you played ball with, but I can remember working out in the yard with her. She used to say that her beautiful nails were the result of working in her garden. She took great pride in all of her flowers, but she loved her roses. Her backyard was covered in a bed of pine needles, which I used to love shuffling around in, much to her chagrin. She told me that ladies picked their feet up when they walked.

I can remember going to her house for Sunday Dinner. We probably didn't have roast lamb every week, but oh, I do remember it. Roast Lamb (no mint jelly, thankyouverymuch), mashed potatoes and gravy (with mushrooms) and steamed cauliflower with cheese sauce. For dessert, it was pie. Her pies were legendary. Blueberry, apple, peach. Even when she moved into a retirement community, people still loved getting dinner invitations from she and her husband, because they knew "Tulie's pies" were on the menu.

And then there was the biscuit. Her Finnish mother taught her how to make it, and when I asked Grandma to teach me, it was difficult, because she had to figure out the measurements. The tradition of Finnish Pulla will continue, Grandma.

I hadn't seen her since October 2000, when she met her first great-grandchild, my oldest son, who was three months old at the time. As of today, she had seven great-grandchildren: six boys and a girl. One of my prized photos is our "four generation" photo with my son, me, my father and my grandmother. She was so proud to have great-grandchildren.

Sweet Son #1 doesn't remember his great-grandma, and The Manimal has never met her, but my memories are sweet, and will live forever.

I love you Grandma.

Rest peacefully.

Lepuuttaa rauhallinen.

Baby Boy

2008-10-16T22:56:00.003-05:00

The Bible is filled with stories of Jesus as a man. A grown man. Very few times does it have Him questioning Mary, His mother. Even with my limited scriptural knowledge, I know of no place in the Holy Book where it has him blatantly defying Mary, Joseph or God Himself.

Watching my own boys grow, however, makes me wonder. Did Mary ever have to put Jesus in time out? Did Joseph ever have to take Him to the wood shed to "have a talk"? Was Jesus ever sassy to His mom and dad? Did He ever not do his homework, then lie about it?

Because, seriously? If I'm to believe that Jesus was born an infant and walked the earth for 33 years, I have to assume that He was a pretty normal kid. Even as an adult, He got pretty peeved at the moneychangers and merchants in the temple, flipping over tables, chairs and all that. So I'm pretty sure He was "all boy".

I'm pretty sure that Mary, in all her virginal calmness got frustrated with her little guy when she was potty training him. I'm certain that when Joseph told Jesus to do His chores, He didn't always do them without complaining.

And yet, somehow, things turned out alright for the Holy Family.

Something to remember when I'm so frustrated with The Manimal and Sweet Son #1 that I could just spit.

Get the Bean!

2008-10-16T16:46:00.003-05:00

I usually post different things on my two blogs, but sometimes, there are things worth saying twice. And seriously, if this woman isn't living on sheer faith and enthusiastically, I don't know who is!

Meaghan left a comment on a previous post, so like a good blogger, I checked hers out. This woman is such an inspiration. In 2007, at age 28, she was diagnosed with Stage 3B Cervical Cancer. She battled long and hard, and against all odds, she beat it! You can read her touching story at her personal blog, I Kicked Cancer's Ass.

Not one to let a little thing like cancer get her down, Meaghan and her boyfriend Bryan, started a company called "Get the Bean!", specializing in organically grown coffee. Here's the cool part. They are using GTB to help fight cancer. How exactly does selling coffee fight cancer? From the GTB Website:

We at G.T.B understand Meaghan's story is not unique. There are many men and women fighting battles against cancer. At Get The Bean we want to do whatever we can to help fight cancer. We have decided to donate a portion of our proceeds to various cancer charities.

THIS IS HOW IT WORKS

1. Tell us about yours or a loved ones battle against cancer
2. We will then post your story on www.gtbfightscancer.blogspot.com
3. Each month we will pick one story to feature
4. If we pick your story you get to pick your favorite G.T.B coffee flavor
5. Next we will ask you to pick the Cancer Charity you would like G.T.B to donate proceeds to
6. For the next year we will donate .50 for every bag purchased of your chosen flavor to your

chosen charity
7. To enter your story email us at fightcancer@getthebean.com

How cool is that?! This is such a perfect example of one of my favorite quotes:

"Never doubt that a small, committed group of people can change the world. Indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead)

If you are as inspired by Meaghan's story as I was, go forth and buy beans!

OK, so as a little postscript, I have to say that I was looking to buy the "coffee of the month" so I called GTB's customer service number, and guess what?! I talked to Meaghan! :) She is so excited about this project, and they are LITERALLY just getting underway, so the first story of the month hasn't yet been chosen. Stay tuned, though, I'm sure she'll let everyone know when it's up and running!

In Me, In Him

2008-10-16T11:03:00.002-05:00

Sarah introduced me to a beautiful song today. It is such a good reminder that I can do nothing on my own. All my strength comes from Him.

This is something that I, as a bit of a control freak, struggle with on a daily (hourly) basis. I plan for a living, so when something is overwhelming, I resort to what I know. I plan. Lately, I've come to realize that, while God doesn't expect us to throw up our hands and do nothing, relying only on what we know is truly the antithesis of faith.

As quoted in one of my favorite movies, faith is "believing in things when common sense tells you not to." When I've given my best and still much is left to accomplish, I can only rely on my faith in God. He has told me that I needn't worry. He will take care of me. As the song goes "His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me."

In my busy life, I can look at it this way. God isn't asking me to tear my hair out or gnash my teeth worrying about things. He doesn't NEED me to have faith in Him, he WANTS me to have faith in Him. Because when I have faith that my God will handle things, I am free. Free from worry and fear. And because I don't have to worry, I can do things like be with my family. Play with my children. Help those in need. Spend time with Him.

Look at these lines:

"How refreshing to know You don't need me.

How amazing to find that You want me."

Isn't it amazing, that the God of the Universe, the Savior of the World, the Creator of Everything would want ME? Crazy, control freak ME? How wonderfully humbling.

If you ask me to leap
Out of my boat on the crashing waves
If You ask me to go
Preach to the lost world that Jesus saves

I'll go, but I cannot go alone
Cause I know I'm nothing on my own
But the power of Christ in me makes me strong
Makes me strong

Cause when I'm weak,
You make me strong
When I'm blind,
You shine Your light on me
Cause I'll never get by living on my own ability
How refreshing to know You don't need me
How amazing to find that You want me
So I'll stand on Your truth,
and I'll fight with Your strength
Until You bring the victory,
by the power of Christ in me

If You ask me to run
And carry Your light into foreign land
If You ask me to fight
Deliver Your people from Satan's hand

To reach out with Your hands
To learn through Your eyes
To love with the love of a savior
To feel with Your heart
And to think with Your mind
I'd give my last breath for Your glory

Always In Him...

Truly a Miracle

2008-10-14T19:40:00.002-05:00

Those were the words that Julie's mother spoke when she was told that money had been raised to take care of her daughter's surgery.

In Haiti, where the average annual income is $300 USD, $2000 for a little girl's surgery may as well be a million dollars, but thanks to the generosity of some wonderful folks, Julie will have a chance to live up to her God-given potential.

And that, in the abject poverty, of Haiti, is truly a miracle.

Meet Julie

2008-10-07T09:06:00.004-05:00

I've posted before about New Life for Haiti. Our 3rd Annual Chicagoland Gala is rapidly approaching, so my free time (along with many others') is pretty much consumed by auction items, menus, RSVP's, dinner requests, etc.

In this time of last-minute planning, several members of our church community took a quick trip down to Haiti to help move our full-time missionary couple into their new home, Kai bo Rivye (house on the river), which will also serve as housing quarters for work teams. One of our church members, Todd Pierson, who is an amazing photographer, was on the team to take photos for use in the NLH materials and at the banquets. Five others, including an electrician, were on the trip as well.

Sometimes it's important to slow down the activity and remember exactly WHY we are focusing so much time and effort on one small village in Haiti.

Meet Julie.

From Todd's blog:

Julie is a special needs girl I met last week in Haiti. She has a cleft palate and is in the need of surgery to correct her condition. I currently have a campaign running to raise the funds to help pay for the procedure which is only $1000 U.S. and can be done in Port au Prince. She is so sweet and was waving to use (after she got over her fear) as we shot her photo. Her mom is currently overwhelmed with buying formula and trying to figure out how to pay for it. This is one chance to make a difference in one child's life. We can't fix it all, but this one is right in front of us. It was pretty emotional to be there on Friday afternoon knowing by just shooting these images, this child has a shot at growing and developing normally. If you would like to help, shoot me an email and tell me how much you are donating. The check should be made out to "New Life for Haiti" and sent to with a note indicating it's for Julie to this address:

New Life for Haiti

PO Box 33

Plainfield, IL 60544

(815)436-7633

Julie is only one beautiful little girl living in the village of Marfranc. Sometimes, though, it's easy to get caught up in the masses and forget that the masses are made up of individuals. In trying to make life better and bring the love of God to this village, we often forget that they have real, pressing life issues.

Dearest Lord of the poor, as we work to bring Your love to a country so ravaged by poverty that day-to-day needs are not being met, please help us to remember all of the Julies living there. The sweet little children who truly are the future of a good and beautiful Haiti. Touch our hearts, as we work to touch the lives of this tiny country.

The Sky Is Falling

2008-09-30T11:24:00.003-05:00

ONE day Henny-Penny was picking up corn in the cornyard when--whack!--something hit her upon the head. 'Goodness gracious me!' said Henny-Penny; 'the sky's a-going to fall; I must go and tell the king.'

So she went along and she went along and she went along till she met Cocky-Locky. 'Where are you going, Henny-Penny?' says Cocky-Locky. 'Oh! I'm going to tell the king the sky's a-falling,' says Henny-Penny. 'May I come with you?' says Cocky-Locky. 'Certainly,' says Henny-Penny. So Henny-Penny and Cocky-Locky went to tell the king the sky was falling.

They went along, and they went along, and they went along, till they met Ducky-Daddles. 'Where are you going to, Henny-Penny and Cocky-Locky?' says Ducky-Daddles. 'Oh! we're going to tell the king the sky's a-falling,' said Henny-Penny and Cocky-Locky. 'May I come with you?' said Ducky-Daddles. 'Certainly,' said Henny-Penny and Cocky-Locky. So Henny-Penny, Cocky-Locky, and Ducky-Daddles went to tell the king the sky was a-falling.

***

I remember this story from my childhood, and it may seem right now that the sky IS falling. Without venturing into the technicalities of economics (which I took in high school and never really cared for), our nation is certainly seeing rough financial times, with very few people coming out completely unscathed.

While it certainly isn't positive (although it may be tempting) to take the role of the ostrich and give ourselves a sand shampoo, I also have to remind myself not to become Henny-Penny. Hiding and worrying are, pun intended, for the birds. Rather, I am trying to calm myself with the knowledge that our God is here, amidst the financial chaos, reminding us that He will handle our worries and fears if only we will trust in Him. I don't call it coincidence that much of our federal currency bears the motto "In God We Trust".

I don't want to be the one running to the king claiming the sky is falling. Rather I want to go running to my King. Running to Him and falling to my knees asking for his comfort and guidance.

It is a time to be especially frugal with the gifts He has bestowed on me, spending them wisely rather than foolishly. Being assured that God will provide for our needs, when we ourselves prayerfully take care of the gifts He has provided us.

I can't run from reality (I know this because I've tried!). But as Eugene Peterson says in The Message, we should "steep ourselves in God-Reality":

What I'm trying to do here is get you to relax, not be so preoccupied with getting so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep yourself in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Don't be afraid of missing out. You're my dearest friends! The Father wants to give you the very kingdom itself. (Luke 12:29-32)

Lord of us all, help us not to be worried and overwhelmed by the issues of the day. Remind us to step back and give thanks for what we have, for it is truly a treasure, no matter how small it may seem to human eyes. Help us to relax in You and immerse ourselves in the reality of You. Give us the strength to believe that You will care for us just as you care for the sparrows, the lillies, and yes, even the Henny-Pennys of the world. Our needs will be met, we will be cared for, and we will come to see that our worries were all for naught.

Enthusiastic in our calmness...

One Small Voice

2008-09-29T10:38:00.003-05:00

"Even faraway islands will look to Me and take hope in My saving power."

Isaiah 51:5

Our church is a partner in New Life for Haiti, an organization founded in 2005 to help change lives in Marfranc, Haiti. Marfranc is in the Grande Anse River Valley on the southern peninsula of the country, south of the city of Jeremie.

More than 80% of Haitians live in abject poverty, with the annual income for a family of four averaging somewhere around the $300 USD mark. Three hundred dollars. Annually. Haiti is without question, the poorest country in the western hemisphere, perhaps in the world.

Many churches and other mission organizations do great good in areas of Haiti. What work teams from NLH have learned, however, is that Haitians are skeptical of "blancs", or "whites", which is what they call the typically lighter-skinned teams that come to help. While they are grateful for the help, very often it comes sporadically or one-time only. For any REAL change, that is, one that will last and be impactful, to occur, two things must be present: persistence and time. Or, to be more specific, persistence OVER time. Often, great persistence over a long period of time.

On Saturday, October 11th, New Life for Haiti will hold the 3rd Annual Chicagoland Gala. This is an amazing event, with a cocktail reception, served dinner, silent auction, raffle, and program. This gala, along with another in Mattoon, IL, serve as the primary fundraising events for the year. Monies raised at these events, along with a few other small events, make up the entire annual budget. If money for a projected activity (like refurbishing a school) isn't raised, then the project doesn't happen.

NLH is doing more than just making the physical surroundings of Marfranc better. When work teams go, they really get to know the people of Marfranc. They hold children. They play games. They teach Bible school and make crafts. They visit a local nursing home (an almost unheard-of institution in Haiti). They laugh with the men and help paint the women's fingernails. They drink strong Haitian coffee on the porch with the Pastor. For the length of the trip, they LIVE with the people. Interactions like this help to strengthen the bond between the "blancs" of NLH and the villagers of Marfranc. Community is built, and for one small village on the southern peninsula of Haiti, and a group of suburbanites from the USA, the chasm between is eliminated. We are all the same. We are all children of God.

I've not yet been privileged enough to have been a part of one of the work teams to Haiti, but I've "get it". I understand WHY we are there. I get it. God has called us to help the poorest of the poor, and Haitians, well, they are that. But they are rich in faith and joy. God has brought them "new life" and they do sing glory and praise to Him.

I've rambled a bit in this post, but I want to try and share with you. This is near and dear to my heart, and we're trying to "spread the word". To paraphrase Margaret Mead, a few small churches CAN change the world. If you have some time, and feel so called, please check out some of the links. If you feel God calling you to help, we'll take it! :) If you're in the Chicago area and would like a wonderful night out, we've got space for you and we'd love to have you as our guests. If you would pray for Haiti, and for the work that God is doing through NLH, we'd greatly appreciate it.

It's easy, with mission work, to feel like your one small voice isn't making much difference. My generation makes me a "street kid". Sesame Street, that is. Although this clip is a bit more my boys' generation, it says so much.

Every song the world sings, each was once unknown.
Somebody felt a song inside and wasn't afraid to sing alone.
If you feel the music and you sing it clear and true,
then the world can sing with you.
One small voice can teach the world a song.
Start with one small voice till another sings along.
And then you'll feel the music growing full and sure and strong.
One small voice can teach the world a song.
No tune is too simple. No voice can be wrong.
Music can come from any heart and anyone's voice can lead the song.
If you feel the music and if you believe the words, sing and you'll be heard.

Singing to Him...

Idiot and Idea...Part II

2008-09-24T14:26:00.003-05:00

So I mentioned before that I had an idea. A really big, God-sized idea. I'm still hashing out details, and I'm sure my next stage of thinking will have some significant differences from my original thoughts.

Are you confused? Clearly I am.

I forced myself, however, to leave the first couple of sentences. And I do mean FORCED.

I have control issues, you see. God has really been working on me in this area, reminding me that He is in control, and I, despite my valiant efforts, am not.

I've often been encouraged to journal as a way of sorting out my thoughts and feelings. I've never really been very successful, though, because I tend to want everything "just so", with the perfect purple prose and gorgeous grammar. Something in me just cannot put a "draft" on paper, at least one that is so clearly "stream of consciousness".

I'm working hard on that. Hence the jumble that opened this post.

At any rate, part of my really big, God-sized idea is a book. As in me. Writing one.

I've had this dream of being a published writer for a long time. I love to write, and have been told it is one of my gifts. Unfortunately, I'm at a loss for topics. I don't see myself as a fiction writer, and yet I can't readily envision a non-fiction piece either.

Which is, of course, a dilemma, since every piece of writing falls pretty squarely into either fiction or non-fiction.

So I decided to go back to the beginning of writing and back to the old-school fall backs. Prompts. Ironically, for as much as I like to write, I never much cared for prompts when they were assigned. Writing about "what I did on my summer vacation" was not high on my priority list the first week back at school. Revisiting "a time when I was frightened" seemed pointless to me. Why in the world would I want to relive something that frightened me?

Fortunately, I'm not the only wannabe author in the world. I recently found a great blog that offers writing prompts. I'm going to have to commit myself to this exercise (sort of like my early morning workouts, but that's another story entirely) in order to see any results. I'll be using this blog as my forum, so I'll rely on all of you to be my audience. I'm apologizing in advance.

Meanwhile, I'll be praying that God helps clear the mud in my head and clarifies what He's working on with this "big idea".

Gracious and loving God, Author of all our stories, I'm trying so hard to really let You be in control. It's easier when I don't have crisis hanging over me, I know, but still I struggle.

I'm sure You're going somewhere with all of the change in me, and I do trust You. Please help me to trust You even more, as You continue to write my story.

Enthusiastically...

I Feel Pretty!

2008-09-23T11:14:00.002-05:00

And now I look pretty, thanks to Judi at Doodlebug Designs! Didn't she do a fabulous job with the new look of the blog? Check her out, as she's running a SALE. She can update your look, too! :)

New Clothes!

2008-09-22T12:21:00.005-05:00

I don't claim to have any sense of fashion, but I do love clothes shopping. Unfortunately, our budget is a bit tight, so I have lately had to limit my shopping to the window/virtual variety.

I've always loved fall, due in part to the marvelous fall colors and styles. Who doesn't love a chunky knit sweater and fabulous blue jeans with a cute pair of boots? I especially love the fact that, at my church, we are pretty casual, and more concerned with people than with fashion. What this means to me is that I can really be comfortable when I worship. Not that I don't love getting dressed up, but I like to move around a bit when I sing or play, and some dressy clothes, well, just aren't made for that.

I even love to shop for new clothes for my boys. Of course, being boys, they're not nearly as excited about new clothes as I am, but that's ok, because in the long run, I think finding appropriate clothes for boys is WAY easier than girls.

Soon, you'll see new clothes around here too! Apparently, the randomizer decided that "my number was up", so to speak, and I won Shane's blog design giveaway. Stay tuned to see which of Judi's fabulous pre-made designs I chose! :)

My favorite fall fashions, however, are created by the Master Designer Himself. I went to college at the quintessential college campus. Fall in southwest Ohio is so spectacular, and we were treated each year to stunning displays of color. While these aren't my photos, they show a place where I feel very at home. Take a look and enjoy.

Dearest Lord, the Designer of the World, help us to appreciate beauty in whatever form it appears. We are grateful that You allow us the privilege to see the changing of the seasons, and all that brings to this beautiful world You have created. Remind us that nothing happens by accident, and know that You, our Lord, cares for each of us in the same way that You care for each of your creations.

Enthusiastically enjoying Your world.

Gracious Praise

2008-09-19T09:38:00.004-05:00

Dearest God, You are always faithful, even when I am not.

I am so grateful that, once you have our hearts, you never let go, even if I want to.

You whispered in my ears, "Never fear, for I am here", and I heard, through the crashing noise of my world, tumbling down.

I am blessed, beyond imaginings, with believers near and far, whom I call friends.

They who lifted up my cries and pleadings to You, the Friend of us all.

They who wrapped me in their loving arms and took me into their hearts.

I thank You for blessing me so richly, and sing enthusiastically...

How Great is MY God!

You Never Let Go

2008-09-15T10:18:00.003-05:00

I've mentioned before that the last fifteen months have been challenging for me and our family. Just when we thought we might be seeing the light at the end of a very long and dark tunnel, we received some news that pushed that light back further.

I know that I've come a long way in my journey with Christ, because six months ago, that news would have put me into a downward, deeply despairing spiral. Now, while I am upset and disappointed by the news, it does not incapacitate me.

Yesterday at church, I shared the news with my pastor, who has been a calming balance to me through all of this. As my throat filled up and tears welled up in my eyes, he took my shoulders and said "And before this happened, God knew about it."

He, of course, is right. God knows. He always knows and never lets go of our hearts. It doesn't matter whether we're dealing with rains that never cease (well, eventually they do, but three days is a LONG time!), devastating hurricanes, marriage troubles, job loss, home foreclosure or our own daily challenges, He never lets go of us.

That one comforting phrase has become my touchstone. With so many others facing challenges greater and smaller than mine, I know that my God is there.

My two year old knows too. He loves to sing, and without warning, will often break into song. One of his favorites is this one, the chorus sung at the top of his lungs.

Oh no, dearest Lord, you NEVER let go.
No matter what is happening in our lives, calm or storm.
Regardless of my own lack of faith, or when my overwhelmed mind simply forgets.
Gentle reminders abound that I need not fear.
Rather, I can hold on and sing enthusiastically "Oh no, You never let go of me."

Sing a New Song

2008-09-12T11:09:00.003-05:00

While I may not be able to quote scripture and verse like so many other Christians, I can likely sing a lot of scripture. So much of my scriptural education is inexorably linked to a particular hymn or song, that when I really worship, it just naturally comes in the form of song.

"Why should I feel discouraged, when the shadows come? Why should my heart be lonely, longing for Heaven and home?"

I, like so many others, struggle with clinical depression. We're not talking about having a bad day, just down in the dumps kind of feelings. I'm talking serious, long-term, want to stay in bed all day, stop the world I want to get off kind of feelings. Fortunately, I have wonderful friends and family, a great Christian therapist, and the right medications.

Recently, I found a new blog, Heart Reflections. A pastor's wife, Shane shares her heart openly, and her post about Journalling Through the Psalms really spoke to my own heart.

I love the Psalms. Perhaps it is because they were David's songs. He sang and played what was in his heart. Sometimes he was happy, and sometimes, he despaired. But always, he relied on the Lord.

"Yahweh, I know You are near.
Standing always at my side.
You guard me from the foe
and you lead me in ways everlasting."

I am coming to feel, more and more, the constant presence of God in my life. It is difficult to put into words, and maybe that's how it should be. So awe-inspiring, so peace-giving, that words fail. Or words without tune, anyway.

"The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be.
As long as life endures."

I know that He is there, through the peaks and valleys. He is with me when I worship and when I despair. When I celebrate and when I weep. I know, because I have felt His arms embrace me, through those of friends.

"I sing because I'm happy. I sing because I'm free. His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me."

And so, to the God who is with me forever, I sing in the only way I know how.

Enthusiastically.

Never Forget

2008-09-11T09:32:00.002-05:00

I posted this on my other blog today, but it speaks my heart.

As I was dropping Sweet Son #1 off at school this morning, we passed by the flagpole at half mast. I asked him if he knew why it was at half mast today.

"Because somebody important died?"

Yes, baby. Many, many somebodies.

Pie Jesu, dona eis requiem sempiternam.

Merciful Jesus, grant them everlasting rest.

Still Here

2008-09-10T08:23:00.002-05:00

Just in case anyone out there was wondering (sometimes I wonder myself!), I am still here. I'm trying to hash through the words in my head and get them out on paper...

Fear Factor

2008-09-02T01:30:00.004-05:00

I've mentioned it before. I'm a bit of a control freak. I'm working on it, but holy cats, is it hard!

I plan events for a living. Part of my job is to try and predict every eventuality that might possibly affect the success of said events. At work, my control freak nature is a great quality. In my personal life? Notsomuch.

Especially when it comes to things in my life over which I truly have no control. Over the past year, those things have come with unnerving regularity. I've come to the conclusion that God, with his sometimes sick sense of humor, just keeps putting them out there to remind me that, much to my chagrin, not only am I not in control of some things in my life, I'm really not in control. Of anything. At all. Ever.

Why exactly do I struggle so with letting the God of the Universe handle my fears? Don't I have faith in Him? Haven't I seen how He has been at work in my life? I've heard all of the cliches.

"Faith and fear cannot exist in the same place."

"Fear is just False Evidence Appearing Real."

And on and on they go. Unfortunately, I still fear that which I cannot control. And right now, I'm fearing a doozie. Without going into great detail, let's just say that it's a situation that is COMPLETELY out of my control, but yet affects me directly, and has been going on for almost 15 months.

And still, every day, God finds ways to remind me that HE and only HE is in control. Like today, when I "accidentally" clicked on CWO's Internet Cafe Devotions and found this.

I can't adequately summarize the devotion for you, but suffice it to say, it talks about choosing faith over fear. Tracy says this: "If we are going to choose faith over fear, then, as we put off fear, we must put ON faith. Romans tells us that ALL of us, every one has been “given a measure of faith.” All believers have been given faith by God. Romans also tells us that faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. When we meditate on God’s Word, it increases our faith! Finally, we need to continue to ask God to increase our faith and then to practice putting our trust in Him."

I never much liked practicing (and I was a music major!), and I'm pretty sure that it has something to do with my need for control. I want(ed) to be good at things immediately. Like right now. Like, "Hello, God? Things are simply not moving along quickly enough for me. Could you speed things up a bit?"

Oh. Right. In His time. He's in charge. I'm not.

Yeah.

Sigh.

So I continue to do (remembering Master Yoda's admonishment "Do or do not, there is no try.").

I continue to practice "putting on faith". And I remember the words in 1 John 4:4 (paraphrased), "He who is within me is greater than he who is in the world."

Dearest Lord Jesus, putting aside my fear is so difficult. Please help me to remember that You alone are in charge. That You alone are big enough to calm to storms that rage. That You are God, and I am not. Help me put off the fear and put on faith, to wear it like a mantle against the evils of the world. To wear it with the love that You gave.

Enthusiastically.

You Like Me!

2008-09-02T00:56:00.007-05:00

You really like me!

I have to say, I can't imagine an actress like Sally Field REALLY being afraid that anyone didn't like her! At any rate, fears aside for the moment, I have to enthusiastically thank the Academy (or at least my friend Heather) for bestowing the "I Heart Your Blog" award on li'l old me. I really heart her blog too, but I know part of this award is about spreading the bloggy joy around, so here are a few blogs that I "heart". Check them out!

Figs, Lavender and Cheese is not a specific kind of blog, but Cindy is a wonderful woman who enjoys life with her beautiful daughter Sophie and her husband Mr. Fig. She's also a foodie who is lucky enough to grow her own figs (imagine that!) and Meyer Lemons. I heart her blog, but I'm a bit jealous of her homegrown produce.

I Should Be Folding Laundry is the musings of Beth. She's a regular mom, like so many of us, trying to balance work with children, a hubby and a home. Ariel and Racecar are two of her adorable children, and James and Jake, the angel twins, round out the family. She opened her heart to the blogosphere by sharing her heart-wrenching story of her angel twins. I've never met her, but I'm sure she's one of the most REAL people you'd ever want to meet.

"Recounting the not-so-daily profundities" is another Heather, this one blogging at Oh My Stinkin Heck. She's a homeschooling, work-from-home mom. I've only recently discovered her site, and, OHMYSTINKINHECK, she is hilarious!

Just when I'm pretty sure that I can't handle the two God gave me, I read Octamom. She has, you guessed it, eight children. Oh yeah, and a fabulous husband!

Life In the Parsonage is an absolute must on my daily read list. Just your average Pastor's wife with three boys and a patient dog, living in Tiny Town. Reading Sarah's blog makes me wish I lived close to Tiny Town so we could enjoy a Starbucks together!

Well, those are five that get my thumbs up. Whose blogs do you heart?

Pray Without Ceasing

2008-08-26T08:21:00.004-05:00

I'm a bit (insert sarcastic snort here) rusty on my scriptural references, being that I was raised Catholic and all, but I know there's something in that beautiful book that tells us to pray without ceasing.

I did that this morning for the last 40 minutes of my spin class. As in "Dear, sweet Lord Jesus, please let me die. Now."

I'm pretty sure that the intent of the admonishment was not that we pray to die during our workouts, but nonetheless, I'm pretty sure He heard me, because I actually had the strength to finish the class. Did I mention it was an hour class? Starting at 5:30 am? Yeah, I'm crazy.

I'm working on talking to God at least once every hour. Sometimes I remember, and sometimes I don't, and more often than not, it's a simple "Hi God, thanks for everything!" sort of prayer, but I'm pretty sure it still falls under the "pray without ceasing" category.

If you're interested in some more formalized time with God, check out Weak Weary Mom's giveaway!

Praying enthusiastically that God will heal my aching butt...

You Say You Want a Revolution?

2008-08-12T10:54:00.004-05:00

I was listening to our local Christian radio station, when host Joe Buchanan started talking about the 60/60 Revolution.

It's a pretty simple concept, really, described by author John Burke, in his book SoulRevolution. Basically, it goes like this: for the next 60 days, you talk to God every 60 minutes.

From Burke's website: "For the next 60 days, try to stay in a continuous, honest conversation with God, willing to do his will moment by moment. Set a watch or alarm to beep every 60 minutes, and put up sticky notes & reminders around you home, car & office, as a reminder to stay connected. Try to turn your thoughts back to God all throughout the day, as often as you can. This simple conscious contact with God isn't easy, but it's all you have to do - everything else will begin to fall into place over time. Even if you're not yet convinced this is true, try it. Every 60 minutes, stop and recall "God is with me right now..." and let that propel you to ask God "Show me your will this next moment. I want to be willing to do your will as an act of love toward you." "

I don't know about you, but I think this is a pretty cool concept. I don't know about you, but I'm all for a more intimate relationship with God.

Are you ready for a revolution? Mine starts today. Let me know if you want a revolution too!

In Him, the original revolutionary.

Life Lessons

2008-07-31T09:43:00.005-05:00

I snagged this from one of my daily reads, Mrs. Fussypants. Some of mine are the same as hers, but that just shows that great minds think alike (or at least not terribly mediocre minds, in my case!). :)

Live the Golden Rule. Do unto others, and all that jazz.

Remember who's really in control. Here's a hint. It's not you.

Don't believe the hype. Ever.

There is always someone better or worse off than you.

The world owes you nothing. The world was here first.

Attitudes really are contagious.

Do the best you can with what you have.

Teach your children that they are not the center of the universe.

Never speak (or e-mail) out of anger.

Be willing to try (almost) anything.

Don't ask any questions unless you're really prepared to hear the answers.

Say no.

Say yes.

Know when to say nothing.

And of course, my favorite....

Live enthusiastically.

In Which I Decide To Take An HTML Class

2008-07-28T21:41:00.003-05:00

Well, it's not exactly what I wanted, but it's certainly better than earlier. Maybe someday I'll actually learn to write HTML code and design elements, rather than trying to find cool free templates.

At least it's not totally boring anymore!

Boring Look and Other Randomness

2008-07-28T16:59:00.003-05:00

So one of my goals tonight during some free time is to make the look of this blog reflect the title. Yes, tonight I do battle with the scary HTML monster and his allied factions of free blogger templates.

On another note (pun completely intended), I'm also beginning to learn the piano part for Chris Tomlin's "Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)". Our fabulous worship leader casually mentioned that she'd really like to use it for services. As it is totally one of my favorite worship songs EVAH, I'm SO excited! :)

Finally, did you ever think that maybe, somehow, your pastor has a little spy in your head? As in, his sermons are talking DIRECTLY to you? Yeah, me too. More on that when I can fashion my thoughts into some sort of coherent ramblings.

Hope you're all enjoying summer.

Stress

2008-07-25T14:01:00.003-05:00

Lord, help me to remember that nothing will happen today that You and I can't handle.

Feeling less "en theos" than I want to be feeling...

It's not even 6 am...

2008-07-24T05:49:00.002-05:00

...and I've been awake for over two hours. Unfortunately, my lack of computer savvy has made my page look like this. I'm working on installing a new template, but simply have exhausted my patience with html code, blogger templates and the like.

On the plus side, I've installed Firefox.

Woo-hoo!

On Growing Up

2008-07-24T05:15:00.003-05:00

Borrowed from my BFF, Heather, and paraphrased to embody her interpretation...

When I was ten, I shouted, "ME"!
When I was twenty, I exclaimed, "ME and Jesus".
When I was thirty, I said, "Jesus and me".
When I was forty, I simply whispered, "Jesus".

Voices in My Head

2008-07-21T10:20:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, our pastor spoke about how when the Devil can't cast doubts on Christians' faith in God and Christ, he acts quickly to shift the spotlight to the Christians themselves. He becomes the little voice in our heads that tells us we are not good enough, not strong enough, not thin enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, and most damaging, not worthy of God's love and grace.

I'm starting to see the light, but I still hear that voice a lot.

The Devil is counting on my weakness, both emotional and spiritual, to be the conduit for his evil little voice, the one that will instill the worm of doubt into my faith.

God knows my weakness, both emotional and spiritual, and uses my childlike desire to be loved and cared for, by opening His arms and saying "I will crush that worm of doubt. Bring your cares to me. I will give you rest."

The Devil takes my negative self-talk and compounds it, agreeing with that negativity.

God takes my negative self-talk and says, "No child of mine will use that kind of language, especially about one of my most precious creations."

The Devil knows my fears of inadequacy and says, "Yes, you are right. You will never be a good mom, wife, sister or daughter. Give up now. Get off the roller coaster."

God knows my fears of inadequacy and says, "There will always be people whose skills are stronger or weaker than yours. Celebrate your differences, don't compare. Know that life is a roller coaster ride, with its ups and downs, and sometimes, it's hard to keep your lunch down. But know this, too. I will keep you safe. Turn to me when you're happy or sad, up or down, and I'll be there for you."

Lord of all that is holy, bless the voice in my head. Make it echo Your words. Words of strength and compassion, not just for others, but for ourselves. Help us to remember that by allowing you, inviting you, to take control of our lives, we have more freedom than we could ever imagine.

Only in You.

Enthusiastically...

Idea and idiot have the same root...

2008-07-15T11:58:00.003-05:00

So I have an idea. A really big, God-sized idea. Of course, I think I'm a bit crazy, but what else is new.

It has to do with the fact that I've been trying (without great success, I confess), to make some healthier choices in my life. I decided it's high time to really WORK on being a blessing and living my life in praise and gratitude to God for His marvelous gifts. Unfortunately, I've been doing a lot more thinking than working.

Sometimes, as a dear friend of mine told me, one's own head can be a dangerous neighborhood.

Anyway, I have to hash out the idea in my head more before I can put it on paper (or in cyberspace for that matter).

I apologize for my random ramblings, but things are a little nutty in my world.

Peace.

Morning

2008-07-11T06:06:00.004-05:00

"Morning has broken, like the first morning.

Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird.

Praise for the singing, praise for the morning.

Praise for them springing, fresh from the Word.

Sweet the rain's new fall, sunlit from Heaven.

Like the first dewfall, on the first grass.

Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden.

Sprung in completeness where His feet pass.

Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning.

Born of the one light, Eden saw play.

Praise with elation, praise every morning.

God's recreation of the new day."--Cat Stevens

So today I INTENTIONALLY got up at 5 am. It was wonderful. A girl could get used to the peace and quiet.

Four-Freakin-Thirty

2008-07-10T05:48:00.004-05:00

In the morning.

As in, once I was awakened (by the two-year-old legs kicking me, and the two-year-old voice saying "Mommy, I poo!"), I could NOT get back to sleep.

Now, I know there are people who WILLINGLY arise at this hour, but I? Am not one of them.

I know that one of the reasons I wasn't able to drift back into dreamland was my worrisome head. Yet another reason for me to empty it each night and give over everything to He who manages the worries of the world.

We had a New Life for Haiti banquet planning meeting last night. This is a near-and-dear-to-my-heart kind of cause, supported by our church. It is heartening to know that we really are making a difference in this little river valley in Haiti. I know that my problems and challenges, as crazy as they might be, are nothing compared to the daily challenges faced by most Haitians.

And yet, they have something that I don't.

Their hope is not waning. Their faith is strong. They believe that the God who puts fresh water "within their reach" (1.5 hours down a mountain, and 1.5 hours back up) is the same God who will deliver them from malnutrition and abject poverty.

Dear God, Father of those who struggle, please strengthen my faith. Help me to believe, really believe, that "you never let go, through the calm and through the storm." Help me, Lord, to believe without seeing, that You, and only You, will lead me out of the darkness of my mind and into the joyous light of your presence.

Out of the darkness. Into the light of Him.

En Theos.

Coincidentally...

2008-07-09T14:05:00.003-05:00

I don't believe in coincidence, at least not randomly occurring. I believe that God makes/allows things to happen "coincidentally" for a reason. Given my recent and current emotional and mental state, and my struggles with control issues, it should come as no surprise that the following things recently "coincidentally" occurred:

On my other blog, I have the "Live Well" snippets. Today's reads "With God all things are possible. Maybe it's time to rely on His strength."

My KLOVE "Encouraging Word" for today was "Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God's presence." (Ephesians 3:12, NLT)

The song that came up first on my YouTube Playlist? "God Is In Control" by Twila Paris.

Okay, so maybe this is the spiritual equivalent of grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me hard?

Your Grace Is Enough

2008-07-08T09:08:00.004-05:00

I feel as though I'm slipping. Like no matter how tightly I hold to the ropes, my hands just keep sliding and soon I will just slip off into nothingness.

Actually, I might prefer that right now. Because the desire to simply run away is overwhelming. You see, I've been struggling with a situation now for a year. A situation that affects me directly, but is not a result of my own actions. A situation over which I have no control. A situation that, for now, has no visible resolution in sight.

It has been suggested to me that my "ups and downs" over the past year may be the result of God trying to accomplish something in me. I don't doubt that. It may be a "spiritual shaking" of sorts. As in "Hello! Wake up! You don't have to worry about everything here. In fact, I'm in control right now, so just leave the outcome up to me."

Apparently, though, I'm kind of stubborn.

I know I'm not deserving of His grace, and yet, there it is, covering me. I know my faith is small right now, and yet He says that it doesn't matter if it's as small as a mustard seed; it is large enough.

It's easy to want to let go, to slip off the rope, down into nothingness. That wouldn't require any interaction with others. It wouldn't require vulnerability on my part. It would allow me to remain "in control" (riiigght...) of the situation.

But God asks more. He says, "My grace is enough for you. Love one another. Support one another. Lean on one another." Or something like that. "Don't let go. I'm here to support you, but you have to ask for help. I gave you free will, so, I suppose, if you want to let go, you can. But know that I'm not leaving. I look for the lost. I love it when they find their way back."

Essentially, I can run away, but I can't hide. Because His grace is enough, and He will always find me.

Help me, please, Lord. Give me strength to share my burdens, so when my hands slip from the ropes (and they will), someone's else's hands will reach out to grab them. And we can find our strength, together.

En theos.

In You.

Well Said

2008-07-07T15:11:00.004-05:00

I posted this on my other blog today, but I felt that it so epitomized "enthusiastic living" that I felt compelled to post here as well.

My blogging friend June shared an absolutely wonderful quote on her blog today. If only we could all have this attitude!

"Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders and says, 'Oh no. She's awake.'" (anonymous)

The "Write" Way

2008-07-06T20:32:00.005-05:00

Over the past few years, I've been encouraged to keep a journal as a way to deal with my feelings and thoughts, and to record my experiences. While blogging is certainly a type of journalling, I don't typically open my heart for all to see, here on the "pages" of cyberspace.

I'm also a bit of a control freak, so traditional journalling, with the idea that things don't have to be perfect, is incredibly difficult for me. I'm much more comfortable at a computer where I'm able to correct, rewrite, rearrange...well, you get the idea...at will, and quickly. I become more focused on the finished product than on the emotional/mental/spiritual healing that may come from recording my thoughts.

I found a beautiful quote on another blog early today. It gives a beautiful rationale as to why we should write.

"It is necessary to write, if the days are not to slip emptily by. How else, indeed, to clap the net over the butterfly of the moment? For the moment passes, it is forgotten; the mood is gone; life itself is gone." ~Vita Sackville-West

Perfect or not, it is indeed important to capture the butterflies that somehow tug at our minds, hearts or spirits. It shouldn't matter that the grammar might not be precise (God forbid!) or the prose not quite as purple as we might like, but rather we should concentrate on opening our brains and letting the creativity spill forth in words.

Recently, I've come across many Christian bloggers who consider themselves "King James Only" when it comes to scripture translations. While I applaud them for their convictions, I don't necessarily agree with them. I've been very happy (in my limited scriptural knowledge) with my New International Version translation, and a couple of years ago, was introduced to "The Message". I think (again, with my limited knowledge) that it is important to consider several versions when really looking for the meaning that the writers intended to convey.

As far as speaking to my heart, here is Col. 3:15-17, as it appears in my "go-to" translation, the NIV:

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."

And here it is in The Message:

"Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way."

I love The Message, because it speaks in "normal" language, the language of the everyday. I can totally see Paul saying "Hey now, none of this going off and doing your own thing." I believe that the early followers of Christ were real people, living real lives, and I'd like to believe that they spoke to their peers in language that was easily understood, and pertinent to the day.

While others may not share my feelings about scripture, I just can't believe that Jesus and His followers were some high and mighty academics who spoke far above the heads of the crowd. My Jesus was real. The kind of man who flipped over tables in the temple and got angry. The kind who sometimes used less-than-perfect grammar to make his point known.

If only I could remember that next time it is suggested that I journal.

There But For the Grace of God

2008-07-03T10:13:00.003-05:00

Yesterday I found out that an old college friend of mine had passed away. It was quite a shock. I hadn't seen her in about 15 years, but my memories of her are vivid and joyful.

Kapra was funny and serious, entertaining and determined. She could make you laugh with her freakishly large mouth and fist routine--she could literally stick her entire fist in her mouth--and yet she would comfort you when you were down. She wasn't afraid to poke fun (at herself and others) and yet she was a devoted musician, dedicated to perfecting her French horn talents and skills.

Kapra chose a military life, and at the time of her death was a Staff Sergeant in the U.S. Army. She served several tours of duty in Afghanistan and other middle east locations, with an Army band unit. She continued as a music educator in the Army, merging her passion for music and for people.

As I mentioned, hearing about her untimely death was quite a shock. Not just because she was only 38 years old, but also because it was a vivid reminder that we simply don't know when our time on earth will be done. God gives each of us a gift--life. He doesn't dictate how we should live that life, but rather leaves it up to each of us.

Since I became a Christian, this idea of life truly being a gift from God has really struck me. Have I really been using my life to the fullest, in ways that will glorify Him? Pertinent to my current situation especially, have I wasted time worrying about things that are out of my control? Why do I find it so difficult to "give it up to God"?

Having grown up Catholic, I feel very much that I'm a baby when it comes to scripture studies. Fortunately, I'm the type of person who, when faced with something new, tries to "read up" on the subject. Jeremiah 29:11-14 has been in my heart as of late:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."

It is a good reminder that God is in control, and we can rely on Him implicitly. He will take care of us so we can live to glorify Him, no matter how much time we have on earth.

Rest in peace, my dear friend Kapra. And may we all rest in Him.

In God.

En Theos.

Enthusiasm

2008-07-02T09:19:00.002-05:00

From Merriam-Webster Online...

Main Entry: en·thu·si·asm
Pronunciation: \in-ˈthü-zē-ˌa-zəm, en-, also -ˈthyü-\
Function: noun
Etymology: Greek enthousiasmos, from enthousiazein to be inspired, irregular from entheos inspired, from en- + theos god
Date: 1603
1 a: belief in special revelations of the Holy Spirit b: religious fanaticism

2 a: strong excitement of feeling : ardor b: something inspiring zeal or fervor

I daresay that most of the world embraces the second definition and doesn't even realize the origins of the word. I learned the definition from a dear friend and mentor many years ago, long before I truly began my journey with Christ. Since then, I embraced the word (and The Word), but only recently have decided to try and LIVE it.

I'm not a naive new Christian who believes that just because I accepted Christ, everything will be sunshine and roses. It's more of an "If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it." sort of attitude. This doesn't mean, however, that I don't struggle.

One of my weaknesses is control. I'm sort of a control freak. Heck, I plan events for a living, and that's ALL about controlling details. God has been challenging me, like, SERIOUSLY challenging me over the last year. I'll probably go into the situation later, but for now, let's just leave it at that. I basically have absolutely NO control over the outcome of the situation, and in order to keep my very sanity, I really just need to trust that God will handle things in His time, and in His way.

This is difficult for me.

So I begin today anew. With a trust in God that all will work out in His time and His way.

Today my prayer will be for strength. For calm. For peace in my heart and in my soul. I pray that I will remember, today and always, to live in him.

En Theos.

Enthusiastically.